Frustrated lady with Doctor for Medical Treatment

Once a lady was fed up because of her husband was not having sex with her,

She visited Dr. for consultancy, Dr. gave her 30 capsules to have one on per day basis,

On first day she gave her one capsule , he had sex,

Second day she gave him to capsules with milk,, he had good sex and she was happy,

On Third day she gave him all the capsules,,

On fifth day doctor call her lady, her son picked up the call,

Doctor asked how was your mother ?

Son replied “ my mother is in hospital, ghar ki halat bhaut kharab hai, Aunty ne papa ke upper rape case thok diya hai, pados ki sabhi ladies ghar chod ke bhag gaye hai,,

Doctor to son – where is your papa

Son – papa hamare doggi tommy ke peeche bhaag rahe hai

Scientist Statement After Research with Two Another

Scientist ideas about the natural Truth and universal Law.
.
1. A Hole Always Attract A Pole
.
2. Length Of Pole Is Equal To D Depth
Of
Hole
.
3. Ups and Down Motion in the process Releases A specific type of Lotion
Which Increases the Population unlimited …………….

 

Scientist Giving Natural and Universal Statement

On Honeymoon night, the husband asked it is your really first night of sex?

Girl replied yes, this is really first night of sex,

( in school or college never got opportunity for night sex)

One Desi Mast Time Pass

Husband with Wife at First Night

Man Surprised at First Night

Boy: Mom, Didi ko sab log"MAAL" kahte hain
Aapko kyu nahi

Mom : Beta, shadi se pehle me bhi "MAAL" thi
Tere PAPA ne
"L" ghis ghis kar , ghis ghis kar, mujhe

"MAA" Bana diya.

Shocked Boy

One Desi Masti or Time Pass with Different Ideas

One Desi Mast Time Pass

Suna hai ke Ladies ke hath mein barkat hoti hai,
Theek Suna hai bhai, Kyo ki..
2 inch ki chiz ko 7 inch ka ka minute maine bana deti hai,
?
?
?
??
??
??

it means.... Roti yaar ,    Soch badlo, Duniya Badlegi

--

Aise Koi Cheez Batlao Jise Bajane Se Andar Se Bacche Nikal kar aate Ho..?
Socho jara kya ho sakta hai ..... Nhi Malum???
?
?.

.

?


"School Ki Ghanti" :)
Soch Badalo Duniya Badlegi.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jab ladki sare kapde nikal deti hai to kya hota hai ???
??
??
???
??
??

Almari khali ho jati hai..
Soch badlo, Duniya Badlegi

Girl with Her Boy Friend

The Pregnant Lady with Inosence Boy in Science Lab

A  Five year old boy discussing with a pregnant lady when she was waiting with his father in science lab.

The boy asked the lady “ Your stomach is so big why it is ?”
The lady said “I have a baby inside.”
The boy surprised with big eyes “Is baby in your stomach? , is it true”
She replied “Yes”

He asked her “Is it a good baby?”
“Oh, yes. A really it nice and good baby.”
He said with shock and surprise “Then why did you eat him?”

The Pregnant Lady with Inosence Boy in Science Lab

Girl Friend with Boy Friend and Paper Roll

Hot Girl with Her Cool Boyfriend

Girl to her BF: Oh Baby today I am wet.
Boy to his GF: Do you need paper towel ?
Girl to her BF: “No Dear, I need some more than that” 
Boy to her GF: Ok then do you Want 2 paper towels?
Girl again to her nonsense boyfriend : “No my hunny dear, I want something special which is big, hard and round” 
Boy to her hot girlfriend : Damn, oh got it you surely looking for the whole paper roll?

Hot Girl Discussing with Her Boy Friend

Frustrated Girl

A Growing Girl Worried for Monkey Hair With Her Mother

A Girl With Monkey Hair and Eating Banana


One girl at going stage of age realized that some brown hair are growing between her legs. She got worried and she enquired her mother about those hair.

Her mother politely replied, “The part where the hair are going to grow is called Monkey, you should proud that ur monkey is getting hair.” …. the girl smiled.

At the time of dinner, she said to her sister, “My monkey is getting hair.”

Her sister laughed and replied , “No need to worry  and its nothing, mine is already eating bananas.”

Banana with Ice Cream

Girls Favorite Banana

Wife's Statement After 4th Page of Wine

Drinker with Wife After Fourth Pag

पति ने पत्नी को मेसेज भेजा-
"मेरी जिंदगी इतनी प्यारी, इतनी खूबसूरत बनाने के
लिए तुम्हारा शुक्रिया। मैं आज जो भी हूं, सिर्फ
तुम्हारी वजह से हूं। तुम मेरे जीवन में एक
फरिश्ता बनकर आई हो और तुमने ही मुझे जीने
का मकसद दिया है। लव यू डार्लिंग!"
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
पत्नी ने रिप्लाई किया-
"मार लिया चौथा पैग ...

Wife After Fourth Glass of Wine

Funny Salesman with Pappu in a Shopping mall with Manager

Santa Joke with Funny Salesman

एक सुपर स्टोर के सेल्समैन की एक बड़े ग्राहक से कुछ कहा सुनी हो गयी।

जब स्टोर के मालिक को पता चला तो उसने सेल्समैन को खूब डाटा और कहा की तुम्हें पता नहीं है कि पप्पू जी हमारे कितने पुराने व् बड़े ग्राहक है।

तुमने उनके साथ बदतमीजी की, चलो माफी मांगो।

सेल्समैन ने फोन मिलाया, हेल्लो, पप्पू जी बोल रहे हैं?

पप्पू : हा मैं पप्पू बोल रहा हूँ।

सेलसमैन: मैं सुपर स्टोर का सेल्समैन बोल रहा हूँ।

पप्पू : बोलो, क्या बात है?

सेल्समैन: कल मैंने आपसे कहा था कि भाड़ में जाओ।

पप्पू : हाँ, तो?

सेल्समैन: अब वहां मत जाना।

Salesman over the phone

Businessman doing business in dream and intruptting wife

Businessman Condition in Todays's busy life

कपड़े का एक व्यापारी नींद में स्वप्न देख रहा था।

सपने में उसने देखा कि एक ग्राहक उससे 200 रुपये मीटर वाला कपड़ा मांग रहा है और वह कपड़ा नाप रहा है।

अनायास ही उसका हाथ बिस्तर की चादर पर पड़ गया।

उसने नींद में ही उसे फाड़ना शुरू कर दिया।

चादर फटने कि आवाज सुनकर पत्नी जाग उठी और चीखते हुए बोली, अरे तुम यह क्या कर रहे हो?

व्यापारी अर्धचेतन अवस्था में बोला, कम्बख्त ने नाक में दम कर रखा है, दुकान पर भी पीछा नहीं छोड़ती।

Businessman Working in Dream

Judge with Criminal for Last Wish before Hang Out

Judge with the Criminal before hang out

जज - आखिरी बार किससे मिलना चाहोगे?
. . .
अपराधी - जी अपनी बीवी से.. . . .
जज-क्यों मां-बाप से नहीं मिलोगे? . . .
अपराधी- जी मां-बाप तो मौत के बाद दूसरा जन्म लेते ही मिल जाएंगे.. . . . लेकिन..
बीबी के लिए . . .
फिर साला 25 साल इंतजार.. . . .
एक अच्छी नौकरी.. . . .
शादी का खर्चा.. . . .
लड़की देखने जाना.. . . .
लड़की के मां-बाप को पसंद आना.. . . .
बहुत लफड़े होते हैं..!!

Judge with Criminal before hand out

Criminal Court

Eight Common Words or Statement Repeated by the Drinkers

Drinker

Eight Common Words or Statement Repeated by the Drinkers

शराब पीने के बाद भारतीय लोग द्वारा सबसे ज़्यादा बोले जाने वाले आठ वाक्य ••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

8 .....आज चढ़ ही नहीं रही है, यार...

7 ..... चल, एक-एक पैग और हो जाए...

6 ..... यह न समझ, पीकर बोल रहा हूं...

5 ..... तू मेरा भाई है, भाई...

4 ..... हट, गाड़ी मैं चलाऊंगा...

3 ..... मैं तेरी दिल से इज़्ज़त करता हूं, दोस्त...

2 ..... तू बोल भाई, तुझे क्या चाहिए, तेरे लिए जान हाज़िर है...

1 ..... साली, बहुत खराब चीज़ है, कल से दारू बंद..

Drinker with Friend

Drinkers are in Group

Husband Wife with Girlfriend's Baby and Chunnu / Munnu

Chunnu or Munnu with Parents

• पप्पू के 4 बच्चे थे. एक दिन उसने अखबार में पढ़ा कि ऐसे व्यक्ति जिनके 5 या अधिक बच्चे हैं, सरकार उन्हें 20000 रुपया महीना देगी.
• यह खबर पप्पू ने अपनी पत्नी को दिखाई और बोला – “अगर तुम नाराज़ न हो तो तुमसे एक बात कहूँ … ?”
• पत्नी – “नहीं होऊंगी … कहो !”
• पप्पू – “मुझे मेरी गर्ल-फ्रेंड से भी एक बच्चा है … तुम कहो तो उसे भी अपने घर ले आऊँ … हमें ये 20000 रुपये महीने मिलने लगेंगे !”
• पत्नी – “ठीक है … ले आओ !”
• पप्पू खुशी-खुशी बच्चे को लेने चला गया. जब वह बच्चे को लेकर वापस लौटा तो देखा कि उसके 2 बच्चे गायब हैं.
• उसने पत्नी से पूछा – “मुन्नू और चुन्नू कहां गए ?”
• पत्नी – “जिसके थे वो ले गया … अब अखबार कोई ऐसी चीज़ तो है नहीं कि अकेले तुम्हारे ही घर में आती हो ?”

Funny Truths but Meaningful , Read and Enjoy

Truth and Meaning Full

* लड़का हैंडसम होना चाहिए, ‘स्मार्ट’ तो फोन
भी होते हैं।

फोन तो आईफोन होना चाहिए, ‘S1, S2...S4’
तो ट्रेन के डिब्बे भी होते हैं।

इंसान का दिल बड़ा होना चाहिए, ‘छोटा’ तो भीम
भी है।

व्यक्ति को समझदार होना चाहिए, ‘सेंसटिव’
तो टूथपेस्ट भी है।

टीचर ज्यादा नंबर देने वाला होना चाहिए, ‘अंडा’
तो मुर्गी भी देती है।

युवा राष्ट्रवादी होना चाहिए, ‘कूल’ तो नवरत्न तेल
भी है।

राष्ट्रपति कलाम होना चाहिए, ‘मुखर्जी’
तो रानी भी है।

कैप्टन दादा जैसा होना चाहिए, ‘एमएस’ तो ऑफिस
भी है।

बाथरूम में हेयर ड्रायर होना चाहिए, ‘टॉवल’
तो श्रीसंत के पास भी है।

लड़की में अक्ल होनी चाहिए, ‘सूरत’ तो गुजरात में
भी है।

मोबाइल जनरल मोड पर होना चाहिए, ‘साइलेंट’
तो मनमोहन भी हैं।

सेब मीठा होना चाहिए, ‘लाल’ तो आडवाणी भी हैं।

लड़का द्रविड जैसा होना चाहिए, ‘राहुल’
तो गांधी भी है।

घूमना तो हिल स्टेशन पर चाहिए, ‘गोवा’ तो पान
मसाला भी है।

दवाई ठीक करने के लिए होना चाहिए, ‘टेबलेट’
तो सैमसंग का भी है।

रिप्लाई ढंग का होना चाहिए, ‘Hmm’ तो भैंस
भी करती है।

Christmas Festival with Ancient Traditions and Children Fun

Christmas Festival

Son of The God Jesus

Christmas is very common and popular festival in America and European countries, Its meaning is The Feast day of Christ, Christian celebrates these days in the honor of lord Jesus, as per the Christians Jesus is the son of God, it is celebrated on every 25^th December, school going children wait for school holidays, generation of every stage wait for this season because its time for full fun and enjoyment, youngsters enjoy this festival and the new year celebration after Christmas.  On 6^th of January the season of Christmas reaches at its end. Carols and songs  of Christmas are very common and people enjoy it, retail store’s owners wait for this for higher sales season for Gifts , fun and food, greeting cards, special for Christmas trees, people in northern hemisphere specially in Europe and America and Rusia people decorate their houses and office buildings to welcome the son of God Jesus,  these are old tradition after Jesus, Jesus is called Messiah also,

Birth of God's Son Jesus

Santa Claus with Children Gifts

                In this beautiful season Churches are decorated for special pray for the coming of lord Jesus and they also pray to next birth of Jesus to spread peace around the world, parties are organized after The Christmas,  there is a tradition to set up a scene of Jesus birth, and a set up of Crèche or a Crib, very first Crib set up by Francis of Assisi in the century of 13^th. Many pictures and statue are situated by the people , it looks like a heaven, Santa Clauses is the very tradition over the world. Over the season wise people give presents to the children, Traditional tree of Christmas is very special, in The Churches, school , office building every where you’ll find decorated Christmas tree. Sending of Gifts and greeting cards is also a trade during these twelve holy days, this is the time when all family members get together and have lunch and celebrate Christmas music and songs.

Decorated Christmas Trees

Christmas Tree decorated on the Christmas Festival

Baby and Girl Joke in play school pool with with innosense

Children Jokes

There were two one little boy and a little girl in the play school pool

Suddenly the little girl asked the boy while looking down at the boy. "should I touch it?"  boy replied "No way baby -- you had already broken yours off!

Boy and Girl Joke in Play School Pool

-----------------------------------------

Student Madam Joke with condom, Thanks to Papa for Not using Condom

Thanks To PAPA 

One Should say thanks to Papa, 

Not wearing a condom and 

Sending the unique and awesome personality on the Earth like you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks To Papa Not Using Condom

--------------------------------------------------------------------
Student Madam Joke with condom

Madam to her student Bunty

Bunty aap hamesha kaam sabse late kyo karte ho ?

Bunty  replied – Madam I am in love!!!!

She smiled and asked “ with whom “

Bunty replied “ with you”

Madam gently said “ ok bunty actually I want a husband not a baby”

Bunty replied “ ok no problem I can use condom”

Student Madam Joke with condom

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Condom Joke with Girl Friend

Son to his Papa, I used condom but after that my girlfriend is pregnant,
Dad explained to him:

Once a man was walking in the rain with umbrella, he saw a tiger was coming to him,

He shot the tiger with that umbrella,

Boy this is not possible Papa someone else shot that that,

Dad: Exactly, apply this to your situation

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Sales Girl at condom shop counter

A man at the drug store – condom please ?

Sales girl can I have the size ?

Man – why not.

Sales girl after having size to the order boy “ one small size “

After few seconds she changed order “ larger please “

Then she again changed the order “ the largest please “

She cried oh! Shit !!!! napkin please

Police Statement Joke with lady Thief

Police Statement Joke

ek bar ik ladki chori karte pakdi gaye

Constable usko police station legaya or bola tumhare statement leni hai, chal dushare kamre main, phir thodi der bad usko free kar diya,

kutch time baad Hawaldar ne bhi statement ke lene keliye ik alag kamre main legaya or kutch time ke baad usko release kar diya,

Phir SHO aaya or bola or bola ke tumhari statement chal hai chal,

Ladki boli sahib ji aaj to statement ki condition theek nahi hai kal le lena

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